Do you remember a time
long ago, when you couldn’t stop yourself from counting down the days and you
would wake up every morning complaining why the big day couldn’t be here soon?
Yes, I’m talking about your birthday. Like everyone else, I always dreamed of the
perfect birthday since childhood. In my mind, I expected a room full of
streamers and balloons of myriad of colors as if someone had sprayed a whole
school supply of paint. To add to the palette, a corner of the room would be
piled up by blocks of presents in all sorts of shapes and sizes. Meanwhile,
sounds of laughter and joy echoed throughout the room as both adults and
children happily enjoyed each other’s company. Last but not least, the dining
table would be speckled with mouth watering dishes catered to each taste bud.
Fried chicken, stirred fried veggies, cheesy macaroni, steamed pomfret with a
dash of yummy sweet vinegar sauce. Laid out around the table, the centerpiece
would be, nonetheless, a huge chocolate-filled chocolate brownie cake dribbled
extra chocolate sauce and sprinkled with vivid color-dyed rice. As everyone
joined hands, a birthday song would be sung with me anticipating a wish come
true as I blew out the only light in a dark room, sending a message to a wish
granter in the hope that my wish would come true. Not a moment later, everyone
would dig in and more echoes of joy will occupy the room.
That was the magic of
a birthday. Be it a kid or an adult, miracles can happen on a person’s
birthday, even if it may only play out in the person’s head. Plus, nothing is as
magical as a birthday wish. The energy of a wish is at its highest peak when a
person closes his or her eyes while clasping the hands really tightly, almost
like praying, to really hope that the wish would be granted on the special day.
I too had such magical thoughts but as the ages passed, it faded.
Not more than a week
ago, I was celebrating my 24th birthday. While I was bestowed with
kind birthday wishes, the companionship of loved ones and several cakes, I
realized I was as hopeful as I once used to be. The anticipation of a colorful
room with laughter echoing was not there anymore. Even as a lovely scrumptious
cake was presented to me, I couldn’t wait to blow it out even if no wishes were
made. Somehow or rather, I just couldn’t wait to get it over with. This isn’t
implying that my friends were source of lackluster of the day. They were great
as they did their best to make sure my day was special and I couldn’t be more thankful.
However, it didn’t eliminate the gnawing feeling I had in my heart. Perhaps I
have become a grouchy birthday-equivalent Grinch or I have misplaced my wishful
thoughts somewhere in the passage of time. I couldn’t see the Wish Granter. A
dark room with a candle lit is just a dark room to me now. There’s no indication
of hope or dream. My birthday was no longer special. It was another ordinary
mundane day.
It sounds depressing
and I couldn’t deny it. I do wish, though, that someday I could visit that
joyous room again.
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